Rough Read online

  Rough

  Hayden Hunt

  Contents

  Copyright

  1. Jesse

  2. Aaron

  3. Jesse

  4. Aaron

  5. Jesse

  6. Aaron

  7. Jesse

  8. Aaron

  9. Jesse

  10. Aaron

  11. Jesse

  12. Aaron

  13. Jesse

  14. Aaron

  Epilogue

  Cold Turkey Free Excerpt!

  15. Daniel

  16. Ethan

  17. Daniel

  18. Ethan

  GET A FREE BONUS CHAPTER!

  Copyright

  Copyright © 2016 by Hayden Hunt

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  1

  Jesse

  I stared at the candle that now had melted wax dripping down its side, the consequence of burning too long and too brightly. Just as I had.

  I was tempted to blow it out. I should have blown it out. I should have given up the pipe dream that Megan was going to come home any minute. She obviously wasn’t.

  She was supposed to have gotten off work hours ago. It had used to be that, after work, she would come straight home to spend time with me, but, lately, that hadn’t been the case. She’d gone out to drink with her coworkers after work. She’d seemed disinterested in spending any quality time with me.

  I thought tonight would have been different, though. It was our third anniversary, and I’d thought for sure she would have been home on time. I’d cooked this fancy pasta dish and lit candles, decorated the table with flowers. I hadn’t really expected she was going to do much for me, so I’d taken the initiative to be romantic.

  Which I’d been fine with, until she hadn’t come home. I’d planned dinner exactly for the time she’d have been getting home, and, now, hours later, dinner was cold, and I was alone.

  I’d been calling her frequently for the past few hours, but she hadn’t answered me. Again, I’d figured she would, since when she usually went out after work, I never bothered her. You’d have thought me calling over and over would have signaled to her that something was wrong. Evidently it hadn’t.

  I sighed and set my head down on the table. I needed to heat myself up some food, blow out the candle, and watch some good television on the couch while I ate. But I couldn’t bring myself to move. I was so damn unhappy.

  And it wasn’t just this night. I’d been unhappy in this relationship for a while.

  I loved Megan, I truly did, but I wanted to feel equally as loved by her. In the beginning of our relationship, she’d been so excited to be dating me. She’d constantly tell me how I was the most handsome, intelligent man she’d ever met. She’d been completely enthralled with me.

  Maybe that was all I could expect after three years. Perhaps there was nothing that could prevent a relationship from fizzling out. But when I’d been eighteen and had imagined being an adult in my first long term relationship, I hadn’t imagined I’d have been living with someone who was basically just my roommate. I’d just… I’d expected more.

  I stood up from my chair finally, turning to the stove to cover the food with saran wrap. I set it in the fridge for now. I didn’t feel like eating. I was too sad.

  I walked back over to our small, wooden kitchen table and leaned over to blow out the candle, but, just as I was about to, I heard the key turning in the doorknob to our apartment.

  I jolted up, turning to the door in anticipation. God, I was so pathetic. I was like a kicked puppy dog, excited to see someone who had hurt me.

  She looked up at me with a quick glance as she got through the door.

  “Hey,” she said shortly. “I’m gonna get in the shower.”

  That was it, nothing else. The candle was still burning. If she had taken one glance around the room, she’d have known tonight was something special. But, no, no comment on any of that.

  “Do you know what day it is?” I asked her coldly.

  She looked up at me, a little surprised. I didn’t normally take this tone with her. Even though she’d been shitty lately, and I hadn’t been very happy, I’d been passive in this relationship.

  “I, uh, I’m not sure,” she said casually.

  “It’s our anniversary, Megan,” I said, motioning to the table. “I made dinner.”

  “Oh, shit, sorry,” she said, not sounding particularly apologetic. “I completely forgot.”

  “I called you over and over. Why didn’t you answer?”

  She shrugged. “My phone must have died.”

  “Seriously?” I scoffed. “No, it didn’t die. It rang every single time.”

  “Then it must have been on vibrate. Look, I said I’m sorry. Is it really that big of a deal? It was just a dinner.”

  My jaw dropped. I was completely stunned by her reaction. I’d thought, at the very least, she’d have been apologetic or something.

  I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised. But, like I’d said, I’d been passive in this relationship, so I hadn’t really encountered any attitude from her. I’d just let things go, I hadn’t picked fights. Now that I finally was, she was going to be a total bitch about it.

  “I took time out of my day to do something nice for you. Something romantic, because that’s what couples do. I’ve been totally patient with you so far. You don’t spend time with me, you don’t try in this relationship, and I don’t complain when you’re constantly going out drinking with your friends. But I’m not just going to be walked all over forever.”

  “So, don’t be,” she shrugged.

  “Don’t be what?” I asked, unsure of what she meant.

  “Don’t be walked all over. If you don’t like how things are going, then just… leave.”

  I thought for sure I must have been misunderstanding her. “Wait…what?”

  “I’m not going to change,” she said seriously. “So, if you think that you’re treated unfairly in this relationship, why don’t you just leave?”

  “Just leave?” I shrugged. “Just leave after three years together? Three years of effort? Let that all go?”

  “Is that the only thing that’s keeping you here?” she asked. “The fact that it’s been three years?”

  I was totally, completely stunned. All of this had caught me off guard. I mean, I knew our relationship had been a little rocky lately, but I’d never expected to hear her sound so ready to just give up on everything.

  “No, I’m here because I love you. Because I think we could be happy if only some basic effort was put into the relationship. So, I guess the real question is, why are you still here? Because you’re the one not making any effort.”

  “I don’t know,” she said coolly.

  My heart started racing. Had she just said…?

  “You mean, you don’t know why you’re not making the effort?”

  “No. I mean, I don’t know why I’m still here.”

  It was like a punch in the gut, hearing her say that.

  “But, I thought… I don’t understand.”

  “Look, I don’t think we need to lie to ourselves. We’re both unhappy in this relationship. So, why are we still continuing it?”

  “I told you, because I love you!” I was now nearly shouting. “And I thought you loved me, too!”

  “I did…” she said quietly. “At one point, I did. But now? I just don’t know anymore…”

  “How could you say that? And… why are you s
aying that all now? Why didn’t this come out before? Don’t you think you owed it to me to tell me something like this before now?”

  “Maybe, but… I don’t know. I didn’t know how, and… it was only recently that I realized I really don’t want to do this anymore. There is no passion, Jesse. There is nothing here for us.”

  “So maybe that’s how long term relationships are!” I argued. “Maybe as time goes on, relationships fizzle out, and there’s nothing you can really do about that. But that doesn’t mean there is no love in the relationship anymore or that you just give up! There’s love here, I know there is!”

  She looked angry now. “Dammit, Jesse…”

  “Megan, please!” I walked over to her, taking her hand in mine. “Please, just give us another chance. We need to put effort into our relationship again, and…”

  She took her hand back. “I can’t.”

  This only made me more desperate. I knew it was pathetic, but, in a last-ditch effort to get some affection from her, I tossed my arms around her neck in desperation.

  “Baby, please, I love, I –”

  And then, something stopped me in my tracks and made me drop my arms from around her.

  The smell of another man’s cologne.

  “What’s that?” I asked.

  She immediately looked worried, only confirming my suspicions.

  “What’s what?” she asked.

  “That… that smell,” I said in a still, monotone voice. “What’s that smell?”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m getting in the shower now,” she said as she walked down the hall.

  And, suddenly, the eagerness with which she’d wanted to hop in the shower made so much more sense.

  “Where the hell did the smell of cologne come from, Megan?!” I snapped as I followed her down the hall. “Don’t fucking bullshit me here! You owe me that much!”

  She whipped around angrily. “Fine! You want the truth, really?!”

  “Yes!” I yelled back.

  “That smell is Andrew!”

  Andrew… I knew that name. It was the name of one of her coworkers. I recognized it immediately because, a while back, I had been a little jealous of him. I’d never brought it up to Megan, it wasn’t something she knew. But I’d seen him constantly commenting on her social media posts in a vaguely flirty way, and it had set off alarm bells for me.

  I’d told myself it was nothing, though. I’d brushed it off as nothing. Clearly, I should have trusted my instincts.

  “How long?” I asked blankly.

  “A while,” was all she said.

  “So, when you’ve been going to the bar with your coworkers… you’ve actually been…”

  “Spending time with Andrew, yes.”

  She seemed so casual about how deeply, endlessly she was hurting me. In a matter of minutes, I’d gone from mildly sad about a missed anniversary dinner to completely heartbroken.

  Oh, right, and our anniversary dinner…

  “You fucked him on our anniversary, Megan?” I said with tears in my eyes.

  “If I’d known, I wouldn’t have…” she said. “But, yeah.”

  I wiped my tears away quickly. “So, what, that’s it? We’re just over? You have no desire to work on any of this with me?”

  “No… not really. I don’t think this can be salvaged. I think it’s for the best we end it now.”

  “What about the apartment?!” I asked. “What about the fact that we’ve been living together for two damn years?”

  “Well, I think the only thing there is to do about the apartment is for you to move out. Because, obviously, you can’t afford it on your own…”

  Oh, this girl…

  Yeah, I couldn’t afford it on my own, because, months ago, I’d lost my job. Through no fault of my own, I might add. They’d just had to make cuts, and there had been a lot of layoffs. I’d been looking for a job in my field ever since, which was graphic design, but, obviously, it was a struggle. And, no, since I was unemployed, I couldn’t afford this place. Because I couldn’t afford any place! Not until I got another job. What did she expect me to do?

  “Where the hell am I supposed to go, Megan? You’re not even going to let me find a new job before you force me out of the house?”

  “Well, yeah, that was the plan initially. That’s why I didn’t end this sooner, but dammit, Jesse, it’s been months of you looking for work. Who knows how long it could be? What if it takes another year until you’re employed elsewhere? I can’t wait that long to start moving on with my life.”

  “Where am I supposed to go?!” I asked her. “My only option is to move back home at this point!”

  “Then move back home.”

  My heartbreak was quickly shifting into rage. “Who the hell are you?! How did you get so cold? We have been together for three years, Megan! Why are you acting like this to me?!”

  “Yeah, we’ve been together three years, but let’s not pretend it’s been a relationship that entire time!” she snapped back at me.

  I didn’t even understand what he was suggesting. “What the hell does that mean?”

  “It means you are the most distant person I’ve ever met in my life. You never show your affection, you don’t want to have sex, this dinner tonight is probably the most thoughtful thing you’ve ever done for me, and I have a feeling you only did it because you could sense I was pulling away.”

  I didn’t know how to answer that. I knew I wasn’t the most nurturing or affectionate boyfriend, I’d always known that. But I had always cared about her.

  And, okay, yes maybe I’d thought I should step up my game a little since she’d been distant, but… who wouldn’t think that?

  “If you had just told me that you needed any of that–” I said, before she cut me off.

  She laughed. “Told you that I needed affection? Yeah, Jess, believe it or not that’s something I actually don’t want to have to ask for from my boyfriend.”

  She started making her way down the hall and into the bathroom.

  “This conversation isn’t over!” I said quickly.

  “Yes, it is. And so are we.”

  She slammed the bathroom door behind her, and I was left standing there, stunned and speechless.

  So, that was it, then. My relationship was done. I really hadn’t expected any of this, and, like I’d said, I’d known maybe that Megan wasn’t very happy, but I’d never expected her to cheat. I hadn’t thought she’d leave me.

  What now? Everything I’d ever built for myself as an adult had been shattered. I no longer had the job I’d gone to school for, I didn’t have the girlfriend I’d been dating for the last three years, I didn’t even have an apartment. I was going to have to move back home, something I’d told myself I’d never do.

  God, this sucked. My entire childhood had been me fantasizing about the day I finally would be an adult and no longer be under the control of my parents.

  I mean, I loved my parents, I did. But they were completely overbearing. When I’d lived with them, they had to know absolutely everything that had been going on in my life.

  Even when I’d been younger, I’d always had a naturally independent nature. So, them constantly breathing down my throat had really hindered me. I’d moved out as soon as I’d turned eighteen to leave for college, and, when I had, our relationship had improved a lot. I’d loved them a lot more from a distance, when they couldn’t ask about my every move.

  And now I was going to have to go back to that? Go back to my hometown, looking like a failure who couldn’t hack it in the real world? I didn’t want that. I hated my small hometown. Nothing ever changed there, people never changed there, it was stagnant.

  Speaking of people who never changed there, there were people who I’d left behind to whom I’d never planned to come back home.

  And now I had to.

  2

  Aaron

  I glanced down at my watch, trying to keep track of how long I still had for my lunc
h break. Only ten more minutes.

  Ugh, ten more minutes before I was thrown back in the hell hole.

  I both loved and hated my job as an ER nurse. On the one hand, I found it exciting. I got into the medical field because I truly loved it, and, in the ER, I was in the thick of it. There was no other nursing specialty that was as hands-on as the emergency room.

  On the other hand, it was a ton of work. I was basically a constant ball of stress every time I had to work. I had to be on my A-game. People’s health was in my hands.

  And my long shifts made it hard to have a social life. That part was fine with me, though. I hadn’t had one in a long time, and I had no desire to start now.

  I guess you could say I was a little jaded. I had been ever since I’d graduated high school many years ago.

  Even during high school, I hadn’t exactly been a social butterfly. On the contrary, I’d really tried to keep to myself as much as possible. I’d always been introverted and a little weird, so I just didn’t mesh with people all that well.

  But I’d had one friend. One really, really good friend. He was probably the only person on this planet that I’d ever really trusted…

  Now I trusted nobody.

  “Aaron, are you ready to come back on?” another nurse asked me as she passed the break room.

  I tapped at my watch. “Ten more minutes.”

  “Ugh!” she groaned as she walked away.

  I swear, you’d think this hospital wouldn’t operate without me on the clock the way people were always bugging me when I was on break.

  I finished up my sandwich and was ready to clock back in exactly ten minutes later, on the dot.

  When I did, I got back to my patients that I had left before break. The first one to check on my list was a woman in her early thirties with abdominal pain and tenderness in her right lower quadrant. I was worried about a possible appendicitis and had had the doctor order a CT before I’d gone on break.

  “Alright, Ms. Johnson, how are you feeling?” I asked her as I walked into the room.